Turn Negative Self-Talk into Positive Self-Talk

Cheryl Sarmiento, MD • October 9, 2021

"Positive self talk is to emotional pain as pain pill is to physical pain." ...E. Mbiaka

Self-talk is the ongoing pitter-patter of thoughts running through your brain everyday. all of us keep a running dialogue with ourselves. Whether it's personal commentary, thoughts on life, the circumstances of your day, you are on control of your thoughts. Learn how you can change your outlook on life with positive thoughts that increase your self esteem. Positive self talk makes you feel good about yourself, it is an optimistic voice in your head that encourages you to look at the bright side, pick yourself up when you fall and recognize when you fail.

Often, we take negative things people say to us and replay it in our heads over and over. We hear the message so often that we start to feel angry, fearful or even guilty.

Common tendencies of people who fall in the negativity trap:

a. You always foresee disaster. You’re Chicken Little: always expecting the worst.

For example: You try on your jeans and they feel a bit snug. Rather than chalking it up to fluid shifts, you automatically assume you’ve plateaued on your weight loss plan and won’t lose any more weight, no matter how hard you try.

b. You filter. You block out all of the positive elements of a situation. Meanwhile, you magnify the negative until it overwhelms you.

For example: You had a great day on your medical weight loss plan. You ate healthily all day, took a walk after work, and drank lots of water. But then that evening you ate a cookie. At bedtime, all you can focus on is your lack of ‘willpower.’ You forget about all the great things you did and figure you should just throw in the towel.

c. You make it personal. You always place blame on yourself when something bad happens.

For example: When your exercise buddy cancels on you two weeks in a row, you assume it’s because she doesn’t like you.

d. You see only black and white. Ms. (or Mr.) Perfect. Things can only be ‘good’ or ‘bad’ to you, with no happy medium. If you’re not perfect, that means you're a total failure.

For example: you set a goal of losing 8 pounds per month. When one month you lose only 7 pounds, you berate yourself and become even stricter with your eating and exercise to get back into the ‘perfect’ category.

Here's how to turn negative self talk into positive self talk:

Negative Self Talk Positive self talk

"I’ve never been able to lose 50 lbs" to "This is a new weight loss plan and an opportunity to learn and

develop new skills"

"I’ve failed at staying away from sweets" to "I’ll give it another try"

"This recipe is too complicated to follow" to " I’ll see if my husband and I can work together on it"

"I’m too lazy to exercise" to "I wasn't able to fit it into my schedule but

will work on making it a top priority "

"It’s too radical a change in my eating habits" to "I’ve never try this kind of change,

and I’m giving it a chance "

'I’m a total failure" to "Like everyone else, there are areas of my life

that are working well and others I’m working on changing "

Your thoughts can make or break you, and the objective here is to make your self-talk as positive as possible. Research shows positive thinking can actually ‘rewire’ your brain, making you more optimistic and helping prevent depression. This in turn can help you stay more focused and positive on your medical weight loss program.

Therefore, loving or hating the life you are living is solely all in your repeated self talk!

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